Icky Post

*WARNING*

This post is not for the squeamish, I mean it. You've been warned. And besides it's embarrassing, but I've gone beyond that haven't I?

So I go to the Y everyday right? I don't know why but every time I get there nature calls. I am a creature of habit and I guess since I get there at the same time every day my body is very regular now. Maybe I just have a good diet right now, I'll just be grateful for that. I meant it when I said not for the squeamish. So I even go to the same stall everyday. I do my business get done and flush. Nothing doing, toilets hate me. I thought it was just my house but no the Y is in on the conspiracy now too. And no lie, I had my ipod on and the chorus of the song playing at the time was...

...thinking why does this happen to me, why does every moment have to be so hard...

So it wasn't pretty, my situation. I instantly put my feet back into forward facing position so no one will get any clue of anything amiss and weigh my options. There don't seem to be many. There are only four stalls and it's a small locker room. Do I just walk out, go get help, try to flush again and risk a flood? The bowl eventually drains completely and it looks now even more disgusting that way. I risk another flush. The bowl just fills again and I hold my breath ready to bolt and the slightest sign of overflow, it will not take me down with it. It doesn't. Feet back into position, ipod is now paused, I weigh options again.

I am now just standing in the stall listening to the locker room chatter paralyzed. Then the stall next to me is occupied and emptied and I just stand there. Next thing I know the locker room is quiet. So I did what any one of you would have done, and I defy you to contradict me.

I ran.